I try, but i still can't describe this feeling. Is it excitement? Is it fear? Probably both. I feel like I'm standing on the edge of a diving board. you know that tingly feeling you get in your toes when you realize how high up you are... where your stomach drops and your head feels a little bit lighter. Its kinda like that. and on this diving board you're faced with two choices: cautiously working your way down that ladder to plant your feet safely back on the ground or holding your breath, closing your eyes, and taking that dive.
i'm taking the dive.
i made a promise to myself when i was six years old that i was going to see the world. its the only goal i've ever set that has never been compromised. by the end of this blog i probably would have beaten this diving board metaphor to death, so forgive me ahead of time, but every step up this ladder that i've taken in the past fourteen years has been to get me to this point. so, i'm standing on this diving board and, ready or not, i refuse to climb down. i've struggled for this moment for too long to turn back now or to let anyone or anything take this away from me. i deserve this.
but to be honest, a part of me is scared more than i've ever been before. i'm about to take a huge step. by myself, for myself.
i know that when i resurface i probably won't be the same girl as before the dive. its bittersweet, as always.
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